SPECIAL: One Year Anniversary!!!

Let's get ready to rumble! Yes, yes, yes, welcome guys! It's a one year anniversary! One year! We're gonna get the horns playing in the background! Yes, man! Obviously, hopefully you guys know who I am, but my name is Simon aka SJ for those who haven't been paying attention for some reason. And my name is Craig, also known as Mr Positive.

You best be paying attention or you better go back one of the episodes before you finish this one. Come on man, we're good like 25 episodes deep right now, come on man. You should know, but yeah, this is our one year anniversary guys! Craig, how are you feeling? I'm feeling good about it man, I didn't think I could do this. I didn't think I could do this, honestly.

It's always a nice feeling to like create something and then look at it back one year and say that we're still doing it, which is really good. It's mad, isn't it? It's mad. It must matter to us. Was you actually thinking that we would get this far? To be honest, I know it's one year, but considering we've dabbled in a couple of things in the past, this is one of the ones that has definitely kept us going, man.

I think the best thing for us, especially me as a perfectionist, was just not thinking about where was it going to go. It was just doing each episode at a time, one at a time and then we just kept going, we just never stopped from there. So I think it was just taking the step was the best thing because we always projected our what is this going to become? What project is this going to do?

And you know me, we always like to dabble between different ideas. This one, he was like, let's just start and let's just see how it goes. And then we did that. So yeah, I'm really happy for where we are. Yeah, I'm definitely happy. I'm actually surprised that obviously we've had to kind of spur each other on through the years or distractions naturally happen.

But I think for us, it's just a level of consistency, man. And I'm glad we've pushed through it. It's amazing. Like December last year, we did our first episode and now we're here. Come on, man. I'm happy. I feel like two or three years. Yeah, it's crazy, man. Putting in the work. But yeah, I just wanted to say, Craig, thank you so much for obviously giving your energy, giving your time.

Man, I know there's plenty of people that's been listening who have been helped by obviously some of the stuff that we've both been speaking about. And obviously, it's just an opportunity just to say thank you to you for one, because obviously you had definitely a big contribution to that. But thank you to the listeners as well, man.

Thank you to you guys for supporting and engaging with us and sending in your questions and your thoughts and to all of our guests as well. Obviously, we've got a big list of guests. But thank you to those guys for obviously taking the time to sit down and be honest and just have a conversation with us, man. So, yeah, I appreciate that. No, for real.

Definitely a thank you to you, because again, this is a place to be vulnerable and this isn't something that is easily done. So basically, you're trusting our platform to enter and be like, hey, I just want to say this is what my life looks like right now. We've gone from Instagram. Even we have Instagram lives and that was a bit more honest as well. Not so structured and it's just a big deal.

And also all of our guests who have come on and joined us, thank you for your vulnerability. Because some of you guys are like, I don't know about all these questions, but you stuck with it. And you even stuck with the kind of the structure we liked of it being a bit more serious, a bit more like straightforward. Because usually we just we banter everything off.

But you really just came in with like your walls down and said, you know what, let's get rid of it. So really, thank you. Thank you to everyone that's been a part of it. Yeah, man. And it's crazy. Do you think we picked the best year to start a podcast? Twenty twenty. There was so much going on, man. You know that already. How about a little reflection on the year so far? What was your kind of thoughts?

Good points, bad points on what's been going on? You know what? I think the best way that's been keeping me going was not to see the bad points. I think we have so many things that you can pick out that was the bad points about 2020. And it's not necessarily that I'm being naive to it, but like focusing on the bad has never helped me get out of bed, has never helped me do anything more. So I think, you know what?

What has this always look at? What has 2020 allowed me to do more that has benefited me or helped me grow? So I think this year has just been growth. If it's a good thing that happens, that's a good thing. You're grateful for it. And if a bad thing has happened and it's made me uncomfortable, that means I appreciate the growth that came after that. So I call us this year is the year of growth. It really was.

So what about you? How did you feel about this year? This is why you're Mr. Positive. No, I mean, yeah, no, I'm going to be honest. It's been a difficult year for a lot of people, including myself. So, yeah, it's hard to kind of say everything was good. And obviously you kind of try and take the opportunities in the negatives as best as you can. But it's difficult. It's difficult. I'm not going to lie.

This has been a very tricky year. And even when I usually when I start off the year, I like to start off on the right foot and kind of set myself some goals and ambitions and say, yeah, as you said, it's an opportunity to grow, to look forward and set the setbacks, man. 2020 is definitely been a year of unfortunate setbacks for myself included and a lot of people.

But I guess, as you said, it's something to learn from. It's definitely something to learn from. And fingers crossed, next year 2021 will be a little bit better. And there won't be too many. It's not even excuses, but it's like, yeah, hopefully there's not as many hurdles that I have to overcome. It's challenges at the end of the day. But you could some people can only face so many challenges at once.

And when when it came to the whole Black Lives Matter COVID, like people losing their jobs, it was mad. No, you're definitely really about that. Like the challenges have been ridiculous. And it's almost like I think what the main thing I've been thinking about is just every single time something happens. When do we just get a break? Just when do we get a break? When do we get a break?

And the break is it could be minimal, like just just having a good fit. Oh, yeah, I forgot about that. Just having a good fit. Carnival has done all of that. I just have it for both of us that enjoy it. Just can we just get one really, really good fit to just like, like relax? Because you know what? It's not. I think I like to say this to people that I may be Mr.

Positive and I always choose to get back up and stuff like that. But there are days that I'm just like, you know what? Today I'm not doing nothing. I'm not doing the thing. So, you know what? If you are feeling like down or weak or just like feel like giving up. Yeah, you know what? Have that day. Have that day. Have that week or whatever, because I had loads of those. I went from back injury.

I couldn't walk properly for like eight to ten weeks. Job was lost straight away. Lockdown happened. All that. And I had my moments of just being completely down. So I think we always have to say that there's always two sides. What we try to put out in the world is saying, yeah, get back up. But you know what? There are days that you just feel like kicking back and just saying, you know what? I'm done. Do that.

Do that. Yeah. Say I'm done. You know what? I'm done. I'm just waiting. Yeah. Let me just wait for next year. I'm done. You can do that. Then there's going to be a day. You're going to be like, all right, I'm done with being done. I'm going to get back up. Let me do that. So I've got, we've gone through that. Trust me. Both of us have gone through it. Trust. Okay. So I've got, I've got a question for you then.

So if you could pick just as a reflection for the year, not just maybe it could be in relation to the podcast and the conversations as well, but what's been your biggest challenge and what's been your, your biggest positive to come out of the year? Biggest challenge. I think my biggest challenge was working for myself actually. Like we talk about it all the time.

Like, Hey, I watch on my own boss and I watch when I'm managing my own money. And when you actually get to have to do it, like you wake up in the day and nobody tells you, you have to go to work or anything and you just, you, that works for your time.

Figuring out how to block out the distractions, how to manage your time correctly, how to wake up at the right time, how to know when to be on Instagram, not to, there's so many variables involved with just actually working for yourself for the day. And the thing is you keep thinking, Oh, I could just wake up at 10.

Then there's certain things that you realize, wow, it's actually good for you to wake up at seven and eight. Like it's not, it's not just the high words because I'm an, I'm nocturnal. I'm usually work at work at night. There's a lot of disadvantages to doing that. So I think working for myself and still trying to have a life at the same time for some, I don't know. Sometimes you go overboard.

Sometimes you're forgetting people. Sometimes you forget about your own emotions or your own needs. So I really think that was my biggest challenge. Again, I say it because a lot of other things we've had, I've had the challenge and I've gotten through it and I've grown from it, but this one is constant. It never changes. It never, it never gets any easier.

You still have to do it every single day and there's some days you just don't feel it. So yeah, I think that was my biggest challenge. I ain't going to lie. I tried to call you a couple of times. I couldn't get through it. I was kind of with Craig Boyd. Craig's gone missing. Craig's ghosted on me. That was the biggest one. How about you, man? How was it? What's your, yeah.

What was your biggest challenge for this year? I have a couple of challenges. I'm not sure what my biggest challenge is, but definitely for me, a challenge was consistency Consistency in a lot of things, to be fair. Obviously with the whole shift in your life, your kind of schedule and how like your routine, waking up, going to work, obviously working on the podcast as well.

It's like the level of consistency to kind of manage that was difficult because it was a big shift, even with stuff like trying to stay fit and healthy and look at spending time. It was hard. So I think definitely a hurdle for me or challenge would have been consistency. There's even things that I've wanted to work on.

Obviously the opportunities now place itself upon everybody to be like, well, you've got a bit more time on your hands because everyone's working from home, et cetera. But then trying to stay consistently motivated is like just consistency for me was a big, big, big challenge. I mean, I looked at it like, okay, cool, I'm going to be at home. I've got plenty of time to do this and do that.

And then half the time it didn't even happen and it was just like, well, what's going on? Why am I like that? So that was difficult. It has been an opportunity to reflect because you've had so much time on your hands where you can kind of set your own pace a little bit more and kind of set yourself some goals and say, this is what you want to do.

Not to say that you're consistent with it because I wasn't, but you had the opportunity to just reflect a little bit more, man. There's things that's been going on with family at home and just trying to think about what you actually want from life and how you're going to pursue it and working on, as I said, your own goals and your own ambitions and achievements and how you go about doing that.

I think definitely that's been a positive for me this year because I've had that time. I've gained a little bit more time for me again. It's kind of helped in that respect because before it was clockwork, nine to five, family, go to work, come home, cook dinner, go to sleep. You don't really find a lot of time for yourself.

And I think this year has kind of shown us that a lot of the things which we've prioritised over the years in our life isn't really that important. You don't really have to do that. So I think that's definitely a positive that I've taken out of the year. You know what? It's been a blessing for my people, the people that's close to me, that they haven't suffered as much as I imagined that they would.

I'm usually a person that tries to be there for people and check on people. So I could say that I'm really grateful for that. The people that I've had in my that during the season have not been as bad as I imagined that they could be. And if anything, they're better than I thought they would be as well. So I think that is the blessing that I didn't realise was going to be there.

I mean, it's a weird thing because obviously some people have really suffered. So but for those who haven't suffered or have found a way to thrive or change or grow, I think I'm really grateful that that's happened in other people's lives in that sense. And I think, again, what you said, the reason why I even took the journey of working for myself is realising, actually, you know what, life is really unpredictable.

If there's ever a time for you to take a leap of faith on yourself, to do something better for you or for your future or for people around you, it was this season. So having the opportunity to even think, take that kind of energy and go for take a leap of faith and try it, it was this was this was the season to make it happen. Because if you're not, if you didn't have this season, well, for me, I would be distracted.

I'll be going to parties. Summer was lit. You know what? This summer was one of the hottest summers ever, consistent as well. So I would have been a hell of parties. There's loads of drinking, loads of friends and family. But then it will be like what I really, really want to do in my life would have been back at the back of my head.

So when that's not there, you get really upset for like a month and then you're like, OK, maybe I should do something now. Maybe I should actually try and while this is not happening. So, yeah, that part is doing stuff that really matters to you was what was really, really positive. And that was that's what I took from this.

So, yeah, we've been working a lot and kind of focusing on a lot of important conversations over the last year since December. What's been what's been probably your most interesting or your favourite conversation that we've had so far? What's your thoughts on the topics that we've spoken about? What's the one that kind of is like, yeah, I like that one. That was a good one.

Oh, I think it was the one with Aaron on ego. We had such a different perspective among each other about what ego meant and was it about aggression and how do you kind of navigate through the world with this ego or this chip on your shoulder about what you believe is right and wrong or what you believe is the right way in the wrong way and how do you portray it to other people?

So I think that was a really good conversation. There's been so many, but that one popped up in my head like instantly that one. And there was one other which was about the fathers, like about how you how you. Was that the one with Michael? Yes, the one with the one with Michael. OK, that was a really, really, really good one as well. Yeah, those two were really, really good. Yeah. What about you?

I can't even say much. It's tough, you know, you know what we've got because the thing is we like to think quite heavily about the topics that we talk about. It's not just a blazing thing that we just throw in here. It's like, OK, what kind of resonates with us and the people around us and even the people that listen to what we talk about? And it's something that not a lot of people have actually brought up.

And where can we drive this conversation? So the one that I have probably. There's a couple of things. OK, so there's one that's probably touched me a bit more. And it's been a bit more personal to me. And I think that was the one when we were talking about grief. That one, that one. Because, yeah, I think that one definitely was an important one for me, because again, that's something that we don't often talk about.

Also your cousin, right? Probably. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So that was the one with my cousin as well. And then I think the one that probably I kind of enjoyed a little bit more was. I don't know. You wasn't in this one. It was the one about male pregnancy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You said that was a powerful one. That was a good one. That was a good one.

So again, it's not the angle that we kind of came with that is something that we don't often talk about, but it's like, OK, well, when there's pregnancy, there's definitely two people involved in that. Even though you think, OK, one person is carrying a baby. What do we think about as the guys? What we get? And yeah, that was a nice conversation to have. So there's too many, man.

But those two are the ones that stuck. All right. So the really, really important question actually is. And something for you listeners as well, if you have been listening, following us on the journey, is how has the podcast changed you from the time before we started it to this year? How has it changed you or changed your conversations? That is a very good question.

If you know what it is, it's allowed me to to stop and think a little bit more before I speak because I've had so many other voices to speak to, so many different people to speak to and heard so many different opinions, it makes me step back a little bit more. So I try not to speak out of emotion. I try not to speak out of fear.

Like for me, it's just, OK, let me process whatever is going, whatever I'm going through, even if it's a good thing or a bad thing. How do I process this first? And then how do I speak about it in the right way, in the way that I actually want to get it across?

So it's been quite powerful in a sense that I never really thought I would enjoy having those conversations because, as I said, people that know me as well as a guy, I don't talk. And you would think, OK, well, hold on a minute, you're the host of this podcast called Talking to my Thoughts, how can you not speak? Well, that's how I have. I've been quite introverted. I've been, I'm one of them guys here.

I just keep myself to myself. If that is bothering me, I either deal with it or I just brush it off and go about my business. So I'm not really one to verbalise too many things. It's like I'm an action man. What do I need to do about it? Forget the talking. What do I need to do about it? Well, now it's just a case of I've learnt to speak a little bit more. I'm still not good. I'm not going to lie.

I'm not going to pretend like I'm great at it, but it's all a learning process. And I think that's what having these conversations has helped me to do that a bit better. And upon reflection as well, I still have a lot more to learn on how to do that because even when we do a particular podcast and then I listen back to it, I'm like, you know what?

Maybe I should have said a little bit more about this or maybe I could have been a little bit more honest about this. So it's just me learning how to actually do that. So yeah, I'm not going to act like, yeah, we've had a couple of conversations. I'll clip my fingers and suddenly I know how to speak to people because that's not the case. But for me, it's definitely helped. So I'm learning.

I'm learning to be better each time. What about you? It taught me more about how to be what it is to be a man, one part. And the second part is that how people are not like me, like certain things that be Mr. Positive. Obviously, you're thinking the best in people and you just know it's in them. And I still believe that everything is possible and it's in the person. But how easy is to get that out of you?

Have the power to push along and to find a positive or to see the silver lining sometimes needs a bit of encouragement or some people just not in that same place or their core beliefs is not necessarily there for a lot of different reasons. We've heard so many different stories about certain things that people have the way people think are very different.

So it's actually allowed me to not assume a lot less about men and other people in general, to realize actually we are very different. And the best conversations are the ones where we meet the person where they are and say, hey, where are you with your beliefs? Where are you with the things that you the way you was brought up? And then we walk that way. How did it teach me about men? We are very purpose driven.

We are very, very purpose driven. We are very driven on like things that we believe are right and wrong. A lot of things that kind of logical sometimes as well be aware of purpose driven ones that had like a strong belief about what they knew or what they believed about themselves is what kind of pushed them towards some of the choices they made in their life.

And then later on in the conversation, they realized, oh, wait, one second, how I believe maybe that's maybe I could have believed something different or something. Where did it come from? A lot of us traveled backwards into our family and how we were brought up and what we believe. And then all of a sudden, by the end of some of the conversations, we had a completely different mindset about how we see ourselves.

And we're like, oh, so it was actually what I grew into. I understood myself better through other men, which is a crazy thing. I understood myself better through other men realizing there are other ways to see a same situation where we all see it because we have one topic. We say something and we all share our thoughts. And I'm like, well, I never thought about that.

So I think I learned more about myself and how to understand myself better. And also understand people better because of the podcasts. These conversations are really powerful. And sometimes when you're just in your own head, then all you're limited to is what is in your head.

But when you get to hear other people and their voices and their perspectives about the same type of life and the same type of choices, you start to realize, oh, there was a different way or there was a better way. Or there was a way that actually that would have maybe worked out in my favor or something I just completely missed. So I really, really enjoyed it coming out of the isolation in our head.

And expanding it. So vulnerability has been really, really powerful in the podcast. Yeah, that's why we do it, man. So obviously looking ahead now, hopefully we've got many more years to come. Yeah, hopefully, man. We've got plenty of things to talk about. I mean, we get questions in all the time. We get comments in.

We just off the top of our head, just through our experiences, it's like there's a lot that we can actually cover. And yeah, I'm just thankful that we've actually started this and it's growing. And we can help as many people as we can to open up and have these conversations. So definitely look out for us. Listen, stay updated with all of our content. We're going to be pushing stuff out as consistently as possible.

But yeah, hopefully this is just the start of something great, man. So great, man. I'd just like to say thank you again. Thank you to the listeners. Thank you to everyone that's been supporting us, engaging with us. And yeah, man, let's keep this going, man. Talking to my first goal. Let's go. Thank you, everybody. Thank you, Simon, as always. And let's let's talk. Let's talk about everybody. All right.

Yeah, this is talking to my.